POOP PILLOWS

Dear Brothers and Sisters,
My name is Audie....my person is Ellen. We are pretty good friends; she talks to me, I talk to her. She had mentioned something about Sir Prize sending out love letters looking for a girl friend (Prize - stay away from my little friend Bella, she's a gigantic pest of miniature proportions, but she thinks I'm cute. And no, she's not my girlfriend, yech! (blush) I'm a gelding; she just hangs around all the time.) Anyway, I have a really great idea. Ellen, said she was busy and really didn't want to type this for me, but she does want a nice, quiet ride tomorrow (ahem).

So - poop pillows. A grrreat idea. If your person rode you yesterday and insisted that you break (I hate that term) at the pole, or if you were out and got cramped cheeks from picking up single blades of yummy, green grass YOU need a poop pillow. Not only is the moist heat most soothing on those achy muscles, but when you greet your person with green spectacles on, they will give you the most wonderful face massage, trying to get the color off.

I make mine by walking twice around my stall to the right. Then I select a suitable spot about 3 feet from the door and unload. Then I'll walk to the right twice more and plop down. With a good comfy stretch I can easily rest my head in cushined, heated comfort.

Hey, you youngsters teething - this would be great!

So thank you mom, err Ellen, for letting me spread the word about my poopy hint of the day.

PICTURES!

Audie,

Its Rana, great idea, its a step further than walking around and stamping all the poop and pee down. My human, Christina, hates that when I do it. I also like to poop in my buckets a lot, but Christina just raised my water buckets higher. *sigh* always got to be one step ahead of those humans.

Hey Rana,
Mom was going to take pictures of my green spectacles this morning, but the batteries in the camera needed a recharge.
Too bad about your human moving your bucket. I can understand why you like to poop in the water bucket - watching those little apples bob around is pretty interesting. I dunk my hay in my water, it's good that way. The girl next door has tried to dunk her pellets but they just got mushy.
Do you have any good gate opening hints? I've been working on that; the grass is sooo much nicer in the hay field. I got it open once, but I'm not quite sure what I did. Mom put a snap on the chain - I suppose that could be a problem, but I'm still trying.
Uh-oh, gotta go. Ellen says I'm being a computer hog. (I know I'm a bit chubby, but a hog?)

Hey Audie,

Good to hear from you. As far as opening gates, I don't worry about. I just jump my fence, especially when I am alone and someone brought all my other friends inside first. But of course, Christina figured that out and now insists that I come in first. I am so jealous that you have a hay field nearby. We should get togather and I could teach you how to jump your fence. Christina says that I have a bit of a hay belly. So now she is making me work a lot more.

I really love to dunk my hay also. In one bucket, I have little floating apples and in the other water bucket my hay. I never tried to dunk my pellet feed though.

Too bad about that not getting a pictures with your new look. Christina has to get some new ones this weekend. I look so much better now with less of a hay belly and more muscle. Plus my winter coat is shedding out, I love my new sleek look.

Well got to go, I got to gwt some beauty sleep before tomorrow. I have a medium workout tomorrow. No jumping sadly tomorrow, I did that earlier this week. But its a trail day!!! Any ideas what to spook at on the trail? I usually spook at something silly like the wind blowing trees or something. I just stop moving because all I want to do is keep mom on her toes.( Her riding needs to be much improved)

Have fun and let me know how everything is going.

Rana

Hey,
I am doing fine, but I am a little sad. The gelding in the next stall was sold and he went away with his new girl person Saturday. I fretted a little bit, I walked my stall and really made a mess of it to let everyone know that I was not too happy. I got extra treat this morning though...I wonder if we'll get to split his share now. HMMMM....could be an upside to this.
Ah - trail spooks....I really like going out to ride in the trees. We have a couple of cloppy bridges to cross, those are fun, and some logs to pop over. My favorite spooky is big purple flowers. They look so pretty waving in the breeze, that I just "startle" myself....got to keep the human awake.
Hope that you had a good ride. Got to eat now. Audie

Dear Audie,

That sound like a wonderful idea. I will defiantly have to do it. I have plenty of poop. The Morgan gelding next to me likes to unload his over the wall on my side. Mom just loves cleaning up after both of us. As for trail spooks you are going about it all the wrong way. If is best to have a massive spook before you even get off the farm. Especially if the barn owners rowdy human kids are jumping on the trampoline. My mom loves it when I do that.

Fame

WHINNNNIE....Very funny stuff.

Try this as well.....When Del braides my freaking fly swatter (tail), I simply lift up and either crap right in front of him or at least give him a good whiff of my colon. One time I was lucky enough to catch the bill of his hat with a good load.

Prize

Ha, ha, ha - love you guys ! You've got some really good ideas there.

What's a trampoline ? Sounds like fun if it involves jumping. My little friends each have a little cart to pull. Tried to snort at those, but I had already messed up by giving a motorcycle on the road a pass. Mom just sort of growled at me and told me that I knew better.

Talking about big spooks - the only time mom fell off - a mountain lion had just jumped into the arena window. .......only it tuned out not to really be a mountain lion - it was just one of the barn kitties....my bad It scared me when she came flying off over my shoulder, but man, I mean - I spun hard to get out of there - wasn't going to be lion meat.

Okay, back again - human's sure don't know how to live in the moment....Ellen had to run and take care of some detail for something she has to do tomorrow...I'm sure there will be plenty of time to get everything done, but she frets.

I don't know how you do it Prize...I haven't pooped on Mom, but I sure don't like her messing with my tail, it just gives me the willies (or did he say whinnies - E). Thank Bucephalus that she hasn't thought about the braiding thing - she just trims the ends up nice and neat to my fetlocks.

Wow, you guys would be so proud of me today!! My mom decieded to braid me up all the way except part of my fly swatter. The nasty buggers are out again. *sighs* But anywho, As mom braided my tail I fluffed, a pretty big fluff and She had to step away to breath hehe, it brought tears to her eyes. Not sure if they were tears of laughter or if she was hurt. I'd better check. brb ok so I checked guess all is well.

As for spooking I had a reason to jump sideways. First as we were walking out to the outdoor arena, I jumped onto mom's foot because a sparrow flew out at me. Then a truck pulled over to watch me try to do everything mom asked of me. (Let me tell you its a lot) So as the man and woman yelled hooped and hollared, I decieded to jump and take off. Ahh the gallop was great, but mom sitting up and asking me(well because I am a lady, I stopped) to stop cut my fun short.

Man, Audie your Right, humans sure are fun suckers. Fame, nice to meet you by the way. What are these trampolines so that I can be on the look out for them. Just to keep mom on her toes.

audie wrote:

Okay, back again - human's sure don't know how to live in the moment....Ellen had to run and take care of some detail for something she has to do tomorrow...I'm sure there will be plenty of time to get everything done, but she frets.

I don't know how you do it Prize...I haven't pooped on Mom, but I sure don't like her messing with my tail, it just gives me the willies (or did he say whinnies - E). Thank Bucephalus that she hasn't thought about the braiding thing - she just trims the ends up nice and neat to my fetlocks.

It works even better when you wait for them to clip the back of your rear legs:) Just wait until they bend down...lift your tail ever so slowly, and let 'er rip. You don't have any skills unless you are able to get it to bounce off of the bill of their hat. Lumena has even done it...That's my girl.

Prize

Gosh Prize, you have good aim....I'll have to try it out on someone who wears a hat though. The farrier is due soon.
We have green grass coming up all over the place now. When my person came to the barn this morning I YELLED at her - LET ME OUT NOW .....please? (Remember the manners, remember the manners, re..) I got to go out while my stall was being cleaned, but really dragged my feet when it was time to come in. My little friend Bella and the other little guy have to wear baskets on their faces, so they don't eat too much.

A trampoline is a big round black thing that rowdy human foals bounce on. But the human foals are not that bad on there own. all I have to do is show them my "pretty face" and they will give me cookies! But when human foals jump on the trampoline it make great big growling and roaring noises, so best to just stay far away before it gets any ideas about lunch.

Mom has a cart she makes me pull, I will also perfume the air behind me when pulling the rattle cart thing, she loves it. She also loves when we drive fast on breezy days in the early spring when my winter coat comes out.

Oo, I have a GREAT one. My mom has been taking me to the vet for two seasons now. I am not sure what is going on. One hand up my bum and then it goes up my who-ha. I don't know what he is looking for in there but I would think by now he would have found it. So he puts some fluid up my who-ha all the time! It's rather annoying and it makes me have to pee so badly! I tried stomping my hind feet but he didn't get the message....so I just let him have a golden shower. My mom laughed and the vet said he was used to it. Sometimes I get the shower going as well as the tooting! It's not comfortable when it happens but funny now as I think about it.

Chantilly Lace

I don't know what my mother's problem was the other day. I was JUST tired.

She'd worked and worked and worked me the night before. It wasn't *my* fault that there was a monster in that corner of the arena trying to eat me! So the other horses just weren't smart enough to see it.... And then she gets me up bright and early the next morning to make me shine and put those silly braids in my hair. She even managed one in my forelock...grrr...I hate that. You'd think by now I'd have enough of my forelock rubbed out that she wouldn't be able to get a braid in it!

And then she insisted on putting on the icky bridle, like we were going to go work *again*. Then just put on my halter and *left* me there (I think she went to go spend time with that *other* horse--there shouldn't be any other horse...it should just be *me*).

What did she think I was going to do? There I am...tired and alone and my feet hurt from all the silly riding she made me do the night before.... I just *had* to chew through that silly knot and just go lay down and take a nap in the stall.

Don't know why she was so upset when she came back to get me. I was just napping. What's a little poo and shavings?

Mom even got a picture of us...she doesn't look *that* mad.
A very naughty Cisco